The Artist Way | Week 1.

Okay, I’m going to be honest. The only reason I decided to do The Artist Way again was because Maddie brought it up and asked if I’d ever finished it before. The answer? A resounding, NO. It’s hard, man. And honestly, in the past, nothing “spectacular” has come from it.

05/05/25 (Volume 1 - New Journal)

But maybe this time will be different? I suppose this shouldn’t be the reason why you do the course. It should be, so you can feel more creative, recover a lost part of yourself, discover the artist within, yada yada yada. Yeah, nah. I’d like to win my Oscar after this, please.

It’s nice to be doing it with a friend and also a friend that won’t let you get away with your bullshit. Thanks Maddie. Love ya. We've decided to keep a photo log (hence the random ass pictures), check-in with each other weekly (bottle of wine, tucked up in bed) and also push each other via voice notes, text messages and phone calls (when needed).

So, what was Week 1? Reclaiming a Sense of Safety.

We start, of course, by reintroducing the practice and concept of Morning Pages. The “brain drain”, the CENSOR BYPASSER. This is new for me. Yes, I’ve done the morning pages in the past, but they’ve always taken me forever to get done, and there has been a lot of staring out the window, in between sentences, aka, THINKING.

This time around, they really are a “brain drain”. They are not special. Or interesting. The grammar? Awful. The spelling? Disastrous. But, they are the first thing I do in the morning, I finish them within 15 minutes, and then don’t think about them again. Kinda like the warm-up of a workout routine, mostly forgettable but irons out the kinks, clears out the cobwebs (that is the morning chatter) and gets you in the zone.

Of course, some days aren’t like this. Sometimes, no matter how much you stretch beforehand, the workout (the day) is just going to be sh*t. I just got my period. Feeling cynical.

I did my Artist Date as well! I’ve never done these. Not really. It’s always been last minute and normally a “nice walk”. Which meant I went to Tin Cafe, bought an overpriced coffee and wandered aimlessly around the park. This week… I went to the archery range. Shot at some targets. Hit the pigs arse (no really) and came 3rd in the “tournament” at the end. Does this mean I’m Katniss Everdeen? Yes. Yes, it does.

Next up… Affirmations. What a load of BS. That’s my honest to god reaction. I hate them. They make me feel all icky. But apparently that means you should “work on that”. Something about what “resists persists” (that’s from Anthony Meindl’s book, FYI).

ALSO…

What the f*ck is a BLURT? Lol. I think I’m going to call them Burt Blurts from now on. Am I going mad? Likely.

Okay! Okay! I’m doing them. Jeez. Well, I’m coming up with them. I haven’t actually used them yet… They make me want to scream. I’m actually not sure I can write them in this post. Maybe for another time?

What’s a blurt? A Burt Blurt is an objection to your positive thinking. It’s a tactic to keep you stuck. “No, you can’t start writing that screenplay. Why? Because you have nothing interesting to say.” I’ve also noticed that as soon as I start on one, a million others will follow in hot pursuit.

The flood gates open. “You have nothing interesting to say”, is shortly followed by, “nobody likes you, you don’t deserve it, you are crazy, the world is basically on fire, you should work on saving it, you're selfish, you're stupid, you’ll die.” The list goes on. But I think it's good to let these out into the light. I think I’ve buried them at the bottom of my soul, where the darkness has allowed them to fester and spread. Maybe that’s why it feels like I can’t breathe sometimes, like something is suffocating me from the inside, digging its dark tentacles into my veins. Yuck.

I don’t think these things can survive very long in the light. Maybe by bringing them out of the shadows, we can see them for what they are. MISUNDERSTOOD CREATURES. Loveless. With a lot of fear. Compassion can go a long way.

Anyway, I have come up with three solid affirmations, I think. Maddie helped, of course. Couldn’t have done it without her. Shout out to Maddie, btw. You know, she’s such a cheerleader to all her mates, and I count myself lucky to be one of them.

Other than taking myself for a 20-minute walk with no headphones (the no-headphones was an add-on), I didn’t get much of the other list done. Which I think is okay. The morning pages, artist date and affirmations were the big ones for me.

But what I will say, despite my reservations… I think I can finish it this time around.

Over and Out.

Me, Morag. X